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Eric Wilson's avatar

I like the way you’re developing the growing stress in the reader. The idea of being followed without being followed, of being watched by a disembodied ‘something’ is a feeling we all experience and your story does a good job of tapping into that (fear? anxiety?).

I feel like you seem to be saying something about Ridgecrest, but haven’t put my finger on it yet.

I know you’re developing a story but it feels like an allegory, like it’s a cautionary tale against misbehaving children and the trials they face by falling off the edge of reality, somehow. The more I read, the more I’m interested in figuring it out.

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